Identity Found: Through His Lens

 I feel like it is important for me to be honest about my weight loss journey. I believe that there is someone who needs to hear truth. The truth is I’m not all that comfortable in my own skin. You can take this several different ways, so I will explain. One of the things I am struggling with is my flabby skin. The more weight I lose the more my skin sags and wrinkles. Some days I think this is ok because it is a sign that I have really lost a lot of weight. Other days I am embarrassed by the skin. I feel awkward and struggle with compliments about how I look because I don’t like the way I look. I’m insecure. The reality of my situation is that my “extra skin” is the result of my over eating and is something that I am going to have to figure out how to change the way I see myself. So, what will this process look like? I will continue to surround myself with people who challenge me to be better. Truth is, the flabby skin is not as bad as the weight I was carrying around. My knees an...

I’m not sure how many of us can say we have children in our lives who will speak truth over us. I am fortunate to have them. A few weeks ago, my youngest Goddaughter (six years old) asked me what I was afraid of. She has heard me talk about being afraid of clowns. I stopped and thought about it and said snakes. She responded with a question. “Are those your only Goliaths?” I asked her what she meant and she told me that her teacher said that a Goliath is something in our life that is big and scary. Let that sink in. I’ve thought about this for a few weeks and evaluated my life for other Goliaths. One of the things I thought of was that I struggle with large groups of people. I especially struggle when I have to be vulnerable in this group. I don’t think I see myself the way other people see me . I really struggle with this. So, this is a Goliath for me. I realize now that my sweet Goddaughter loves me and wants me to be a better person. All three of my Godchildren (and their parents) s...

 Sometimes it is difficult to figure out what you are called to do. I feel strongly that I am supposed to encourage people and love like Christ does. This includes loving myself. I have not always recognized this. My goal everyday is to be better than I was yesterday. This means that I need to learn from the hard stuff. I have learned a ton about myself in the last 14 months.  Let’s go back to December of 2022. I weighed around 350 pounds. My size was taking a toll on my joints and back. I couldn’t walk far and standing up for an extended time was not an option. Moving was difficult and my self image was not good. I finally admitted that I had been eating to cover my pain from my mother’s passing. During this time I had a friend ask if I had ever considered going to a weight loss group. She was very careful with her words. In January of 2023, I went with her and weighed in. I was full of all kinds of emotion. I was scared. I thought more than once about admitting how bad I let...